As an adult, you think when you reach a certain age that you already know too much. You’ve gone through enough experiences in life that taught you so much about love, heartbreak, wisdom, pain, healing and starting over. You’ve met enough people who taught you how to determine who’s right or wrong, who’s honest and who’s shady and generally, you feel like you have a good sense of judgment when it comes to choosing the people you want in your future and making sensible decisions in your life.
You are aware that life is full of surprises and everything is unpredictable but for some reason, you have faith that what’s coming is better than what has passed. You feel like you’ve learned enough to pass the test and get a good grade, but then something happens that shakes you. Something you didn’t see coming, something you didn’t expect, something you thought would never happen to you and that’s the moment you realize that the lessons are not over, that you’re not prepared for the test and that God is not done teaching you what you need to learn.
You slowly begin to understand that God has denied you certain prayers or certain wishes because his new lessons are going to change your mind or maybe your heart. They will make you wish for different things. They will make you a different person. They will make you thankful that certain things didn’t work out because they wouldn’t have aligned with who you want to become.
You begin to trust his timing and his plans, it starts making sense when you put two and two together. It adds up. You realize that without these new lessons, you could’ve made a decision that was going to hurt you or trapped yourself somewhere you don’t belong or with someone who makes you miserable.
You begin to appreciate the pain, the delays, the setbacks because through them you got to know yourself a little better. They led you to find yourself and your passion. They pushed you to end things and say goodbye to people you loved and wanted so you can be who you really want to be. They pushed you to be in a better place emotionally, mentally or financially.
When God doesn’t give you something you’re praying for right away, it means he’s not done teaching you what you need to learn. He’ll bring you changes that will ultimately change you and you’ll look back and understand why you had to wait. You’ll look back and thank him for not granting you those wishes right away.
You’ll look back and realize that sometimes you wished for things you were not ready for, things you could’ve easily destroyed if they were yours. You’ll realize that you still need to learn a few more lessons before you’re fully ready to embrace and appreciate his gifts and his blessings.
You’ll realize that you’ll forever be his student and he’ll always have the final say because you still won’t get all the answers right no matter who you are or how much you know. You still need his confirmation. You still need his approval. He’s always going to know better. He’s always going to prepare you for the hardest tests so you can achieve the greatest score.
Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.
More Info: thoughtcatalog.com